I arrived at The Red Queen at exactly 7PM. I saw Stephen sitting at a table in one of the corners of the restaurant. He waved at me. He looked wary and distressed. I came up to him and took a seat. He was about to wave at a waiter when I stopped him. I told him I won’t be staying long.
“How are you?” he smiled bitterly. I know he was trying to make me feel at ease.
“We are great,” I said. “I mean, Aaron and I are doing great together. Thanks for asking.
“Oh!” he was surprised with my answer. “That’s good to hear. You two are really getting along well. I’m glad.”
“I’ve heard you’ve been drinking the whole time.”
“Yeah,” he said. That part gave me a sad feeling. Maybe he was very affected with everything that’s happened. “I need to relax a bit, you know. I have been very busy with a lot of things.” I could tell from his face that he was lying.
“So, what are you going to tell me?” I asked.
He stared at me with his sad eyes. He didn’t say a word. I should be feeling uncomfortable with that, but I didn’t. Instead, I just let him look at me like there’s no tomorrow.
“I missed you,” finally, he said. I expected he would say that. I missed him, too, but I can’t tell him about it. For two weeks, I’ve been thinking about him even if I was always with Aaron. All of a sudden, he held my hand and pressed it softly. I felt a sudden sensation – a longing I’ve not felt for a long time already. I took my hand back. I got scared that I might not be able to tell him what I’ve been wanting to say.
“We can’t see each other anymore, Steve,” I said. He got surprised.
“W-why not?” he asked.
“Because I don’t want to see you anymore,” I lied to him.
“Why?” he asked with teary eyes. I wanted to hug him and tell I was sorry, but I can’t. I don’t have the strength to do so. He continued, “Nikki, you are very important to me.”
“I don’t want to be important, Steve. I wanna be loved… and it’s not my fault that you got Reese pregnant. That, alone is tearing us apart. You need to face the fact that you and I were never meant to be,” I cried. I let out all of the emotions I felt inside.
“But I don’t love her.”
“And you don’t love me, too -”
“You don’t have any idea -”
“You don’t love me and that’s the truth! It hurts me so much because no matter how I try to convince myself that you love me, I always end up with the reality that you will never love me. Yes, I mean something to you…” I stood up, trying to wipe the tears in my eyes. “…but it was never enough to make me stay.” I left him. I was broken-hearted. I was crying as I started the car engine. I’ve decided not to see him anymore. There’s no need for us to talk anymore.
…to be continued
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